When your partner has a midlife crisis, it can almost feel like you’re having one as well. A midlife crisis can take a toll on not only a person, but any other people that they may be involved with. A midlife crisis can affect different people in different ways. Just because Hollywood makes it seem like every time someone gets a midlife crisis, they go out and buy an expensive car or motorcycle, doesn’t mean that is how it happens in real life. Your partner may begin showing signs of a midlife crisis in a number of ways. The best thing you can do for your partner when they are going through their midlife crisis is to try to be understanding, supportive, and be willing to work with your partner, so that they can get over their issues, and then move on with their life.
Try to Get Them Talking About How They Feel
When you think your partner may be going through a midlife crisis, try to get them talking about how they feel. A midlife crisis often feels extremely hard because a person feels like they are going through it all by themselves. Let your partner know that you are there for them, and that you want to be supportive to help them get over whatever it is that is bothering them. Ask them to explain the issue, and the need for whatever change they want to make. If your partner wants to buy an expensive car, for example, try asking them what having the car will do for them.
Ask them how the car will make them feel five years from now. If your partner wants to get something like a tattoo or piercing for their midlife crisis, ask them how they think they will feel about their decision later on. Piercings can be removed, but tattoos are usually permanent. Find out why they believe doing what they want to do will help them cope. Be open-minded when you’re listening to their explanation. Don’t try to shoot everything down, but give them other things to consider, so that they can see everything from all angles.
Be Willing to Compromise with Them
You need to be willing to compromise with your partner when they are going through their midlife crisis. Chances are there isn’t anything you can do to stop them from having one, so you’ll need to find a way to make things easier on the both of you. If your partner wants a risqué tattoo, suggest that they get it somewhere that can’t be seen unless your partner is practically naked. This way, if they regret their tattoo later on, they won’t have to deal with everyone seeing it every time they roll up their sleeves. If your partner has to have that car, try to suggest that they find another car that isn’t so expensive. Show them that you are trying to work with them, and that you aren’t trying to control what they do. It will make things easier for both of you. If your partner feels like you are trying to control them, they will lash out and do things just to spite you. It will almost feel like you’re dating a teenager.
Even though you’re compromising with your partner, you have to be careful not to lose yourself in the process. If you let your partner do everything they want during their midlife crisis, you may start to feel like you’re helpless, and have lost control over your own life. Remember, some partner’s midlife crisis is to cheat, and that shouldn’t be something that you should be willing to settle for. Stand up to your partner when they are doing things that hurt you emotionally. Don’t allow your partner to hurt you.
A midlife crisis can be hard to deal with for you and your partner. It is important that the two of you communicate as much as possible during a midlife crisis. If your partner seems like they aren’t willing to talk to you, still offer your support. Tell them how you feel, but ultimately make them aware that whatever they decide to do will be on them. Understand what they are going through, but hold them accountable for any illogical decisions that they make. Just because your partner is going through a midlife crisis does not mean that you should suffer, or should be treated as though your thoughts and feelings don’t matter.